Life Update, Mom is fine :)

Hi everyone!

I thought I would post a little update about the personal things in my life. I'm never sure how much to share and never want to be doom and gloom. :) See? I add the smiley face to keep it light. 

It's been a year and a half already that I've been out on the east coast, in my home town of Moncton, caring for my mom. If you didn't see my first update, mama has Alzheimer's and it's pretty advanced. She needs help with everything as she can't remember how to do anything. When I decided it was time to stay here, she wasn't able to pour a bowl of cereal, or would slice a tomato in her cereal, and would get dressed in 2 or 3 pairs of pants, and many tops. I had cameras on her, so I knew I just had to be here.

Some sad but cute things. Mom talks to the woman in the mirror. She'll look at me and point to her and I'll say, "she's cute, eh?", and she'll say yeah, with a big smile on her face. Which I think is a beautiful metaphor for life. Talk about yourself the same way you talk about other people, in the positive way. If she knew that she was the woman in the mirror, she would say she's cute. I'm not sure how old she is in her mind, but she has no idea that she is older.

So now, I get a few hours per day to do some work. I have a PSW who comes in 5 days a week for 5 hours a day, and then on Mondays I bring her to a daycare program that is put on by a wonderful organization called Nursing Homes Without Walls. She loves it there, everyone is so nice. A lovely man named Henry (pictured below, showing mom how to golf) is in love with her. His wife told me so. And now he tells everyone that they're engaged. He's very happy, and my mom has no idea what's happening. But she smiles when she sees him and he holds her arm whenever they walk somewhere.

Work wise. It's really hard for me to find fabrics. Straight up. I'm used to seeing it in person, feeling it, the textures, the colours, especially for fall with those beautiful sweater knits. I also still have some important patterns at my studio in Toronto. Spring will be easier as it's more about the prints in those lovely flowing rayons!

I did make the difficult, or not difficult but more sad... but not heartbreaking, decision to close up my Toronto studio. I'm actually ok with it. I'll be setting up my machines and cutting table here in Moncton, which will make work so much easier! And faster!! I just need to get to Toronto, which is the difficult part because I can't leave mom alone... but I can book a respite bed for her for a couple of weeks.

I miss OOAK!!! But I will be back. The handmade industry isn't quite here in Moncton.

Mama is on the wait list to go to a nursing home. It looks like it will only be a few more months, at which point I will still be here in Moncton, but I would go to Toronto once a month ish. Visit friends, look at fabric, work with my contractors. Slowly get that Nicole life back on track.

All that being said. This is where I need to be and I will never regret this time spent here. I know a lot of you have been through this already or are going through it now. I have family and friends here going through it as well and it's good to have people around you in these similar situations. Sharing feelings, stories, and information. Sometimes it's hard to find all the info when there is so much to learn!!

I know a lot of you have gone through this, or are going through it now. I have friends and family who are going through the same thing, and it's good to have people around who are going through a similar situation. Sharing emotions, story, and information. Sometimes it's hard to absorb all the information that is out there, or find what you need.

So, I am here, if anyone wants to chat. I'm ok. It's a roller coaster of emotions and feelings, and we take it one day at a time.

Thank you all for sticking around with me through it all!

I miss seeing you all and I appreciate you so much!

Love, Nicole

Below are some photos of mom with dogs that I've been boarding. I am boarding less and less as the barking bothers her, and she is not engaging as much.